Author: itoccurstocp

Okay, admit it.  Haven’t you looked around for a set of keys you had in your pocket, for a hat you had on your head, for glasses you were wearing, for a phone in your hand or pocket?  I have.  And that being the case, isn’t it quite possible that in the quest for enough we are already there?

Which brings to mind this from Barbara Brown Taylor’s An Altar To The World “No one longs for what he or she already has, and yet the accumulated insight of those wise about the spiritual life suggests that the reason so many of us cannot see the red X that marks the spot is because we are standing on it. The treasure we seek requires no lengthy expedition, no expensive equipment, no superior aptitude or special company. All we lack is the willingness to imagine that we already have everything we need. The only thing missing is our consent to be where we are.”

Those last part is worth repeating.  “…we already have everything we need.  The only thing missing is our consent to be where we are.

In an August 11 New York Times column, Frank Bruni comments on hate – “Its sprawl is as demoralizing as its staying power.”  Bruni notes elsewhere in the article: “In movies, songs, and greeting cards, I’m always hearing or seeing that love is forever and that it conquers all.  Well, hate may be even more durable, and it has the muscle to fight love to a draw.”

I understand Bruni’s frustration, and in the short term maybe a draw is the best one can hope for in the battle between love and hate.  Still, it seems clear that returning hate for hate is a lose/lose proposition.  In this I am reminded of a couple of quotes.  From David Wilcox’s song, Show the Way: “If someone wrote the play, just to glorify what’s stronger than hate, would they not arrange the stage, to look as if the hero came to late?”  And from Martin Luther King, Jr.: ““Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.”

It is already plenty dark.  Be a star.

I was listening to the Revisionist History podcast by Malcom Gladwell recently.  In Dr. Rock’s Taxonomy he tells of the story of Dr. John Rock, the physician who developed the birth control pill.  Rock was, throughout his life, a devout Catholic who attended mass every day.  When interviewed back in the 1970s he told the story of a woman who wrote to him to tell him that given his development of The Pill he “nauseated” her.  She admonished him and noted that he had to “meet his God and account for your work here on earth.”  His response in a letter back is classic:

“I am sorry I upset your stomach.  You may be very sure that I have gone through some inner pains myself over this problem that you are now concerned with.  As far as meeting my God, I have been taught and believe that He is with me here all the time.  As I have to meet Him every day, I really try to conform to what He tells me to do.  Perhaps I am a little hard of hearing at times, but I do my best.”

I so like that, and it occurs to me to be a valid aspiration for each day – “I really try to conform to what He tells me to do.  Perhaps I am a little hard of hearing at times, but I do my best.”

Hatred seems to beget hatred.  Claims of hatred seem to beget claims of hatred.  When claims of hatred are tossed back and forth it seems people quickly forget the source of the hatred.  Soon the A’s hate the B’s because they are B’s and the B’s hate the A’s because they are A’s – as if that were reason enough.  In time the hatred just becomes ingrained, almost reflexive, and gets bogged down in ancillary arguments like “who hated first” or “who hated most.”

Whether we are talking hatred or its younger, less developed sibling – let’s call him/her “Animosity” — someone has to diffuse the situation lest the animosity/hatred escalate.  The mental picture that comes to mind is that of two people tossing a “pin pulled” live grenade back and forth while arguing over who pulled the pin.  What they fail to see, or even consider, is that what is most needed at that point is that the grenade be tossed aside, not back.

Hatred is wrong.  Never give it a pass.  It must be called out for what it is, when it is, where it is. Personal expressions of hatred, political messages of hatred or stated group purposes of hatred may all fall under the umbrella of First Amendment protected speech, but the first five words of the First Amendment are “Congress shall make no law….”  The limitations/obligations of the state aside, as citizens, as humans, we are allowed, required, to call out hatred for what it is, when it is, where it is lest it ultimately devour us.  Hatred is wrong.

From Heather Havrilesky’s What If This Were Enough:

“We are called to savor the process of our own slow, patient development, instead of suffering an enervated anxious state over our value or popularity.”

That can be a tall order, to “savor the process of our own slow, patient development.”  In this time when nearly everything can be brought to our door, or we to it, immediately, “slow, patient development” does not seem to be in favor.  We want what when we want it, and we typically want it, are getting used to getting it, NOW.

In many ways it seems that the “enervated anxious state” has become the accepted norm.  But of coursed some things just take time, whether we like it or not.  I am reminded of Billy Joe Shaver’s song (made popular by John Anderson) – “I’m just an old chunk of coal, but I’m gonna be a diamond some day….”  Or, there’s Ashley Gorley and Bryan Simpson’s song (made popular by Sammy Kershaw, and more so by Tim McGraw) – “I ain’t as good as I’m gonnna get, but I’m better than I used to be.”

A while back I stumbled across The Devil’s Dictionary, a collection of a newspaper column written by Ambrose Bierce in the late 1800s and early 1900s.  It speaks to both the timelessness and the insight that can be provided by dry-witted sarcasm.

“Christian, n.  One who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor.  One who follows the teachings of Christ in so far as they are not inconsistent with a life of sin.”

Guilty on both counts!

Photo taken in Central Park a few weeks back.  (Light altered a bit to add contrast.)

From Richard Rohr, in Everything Belongs:

“I hope we can say ego is not bad.  It is necessary.  The only problem is that our culture teaches that ego is the only game in town.  We take it a little too seriously and take the private ego as if it is full reality.  The nature of the ego is that it tries to fix, name, control, and insure everything for itself.  We want predictability.  But that fixes us in the past.  What was, is, so we are trapped in repeating it and nothing new happens.”

Wow!  There’s a lot to unpack in there, but at the center of it all seems to be the assumption that others see, feel, and experience things as I do – and if they don’t, well, they damn well should.  One would think that decades of experience to the contrary would have worn my ego down on this belief, but that ego is, it seems, one tough, resilient sucker!  That is, it occurs to me, Rohr’s point.  The ego is not bad.  We want/need it to be tough lest we melt into a puddle with each adversity, but at the same time, it needs to be a bit more open-minded, less cocksure.  Which I guess takes us back to metanoia, and that constant Romans 12:2 renewing of the mind.

Recently I read a story about a long-time restaurant in town that was closing – closing today after more than sixty-five years in business.  The restaurant happens to be one of my favorites.  I have had many meals there.  Driving by it recently, shortly after the closing announcement, I noted it was very busy, I guess because people want to get one more memory of the place, though maybe they just want a good plate of cheese enchiladas.  Whatever the reason, it occurred to me that I already had good memories of the place, and Lord knows I have had my share of cheese enchiladas there.

It occurred to me that this was yet another reason (as if we needed any) to live in the present, to savor those moments in life whether they come in the form of a light rain while sitting on the porch swing, the solid crack of the bat from a well-hit baseball, or a warm, almost too hot plate of cheese enchiladas, beans, and rice.  All which lead me to this thought:  One can spend so much time and effort looking forward (plans) and looking back (regrets) that the power of the present (now) is lost.