It occurs to me…

I read this beautiful piece of writing in Uncommon Gratitude by Joan Chittister:

“Rosa Parks died quite recently, the black woman who refused to give up her seat all those years ago on a bus in Alabama: the incident that really sparked the final and greatest phase of the civil rights movement. She was a humble person, even dare we say it, a good sinner. She knew that she was caught up in a system of unreality, not by her fault or choice; she knew that she ought to be asking a question about it; she knew that there was, all of a sudden, a choice about whether she would let daily absurdity and injustice go unchallenged. And she was too tired to argue with her intuitions. She took her responsibility because, as a good sinner, she knew that whatever in her life was marked by a selfishness or idleness she could change if she wanted was somehow connected with the evil of the world around—and that therefore there was a possibility, an extraordinary possibility, of acting as if that evil was not the last word. If she could decide about something no one expected her to decide about, what might become possible for others? She didn’t know, and I don’t for a moment imagine that all this sort of thing went consciously through her head—but she acted as if the world was bigger than she or her society had thought.”

Two thoughts catch my attention there – That the thought that evil is not the last word, and the thought that I can change myself, we can change the world, by acting as if the world is bigger than I/we had thought.

“There are joys which long to be ours.  God sends ten thousand truths, which come about us like birds seeking inlet; but we are shut up to them, and so they bring us nothing, but sit and sing awhile upon the roof, and then fly away.”  Henry Ward Beecher

Oh, the joys/birds I have missed!  But wait, what’s that singing I hear?

“As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”  Proverbs 27:17

Yes, the friction of two things, each against the other, can sharpen, but can also dull.  The abrasive quality of a whetstone can sharpen a knife, but if not properly used, it can also dull the knife’s edge.  Similarly, communication between two people with varying ideas and ideologies can sharpen each, but their communications can also “dull” each.

All this to say that in dialogue today we seem to have more dulling than sharpening going on.  We don’t have “dialogue” so much as “argument.”  The vision that often comes to mind these days when engaged in or watching others engage in conversation is that of two fighters in a ring who step into the middle and beat on each other, then retreat to their respective corners and glare across the ring at the other.  Thus, this from Joan Chittister’s Uncommon Gratitude is instructive and insightful:

“Being able to think differently from those around us and being able to function lovingly with people who think otherwise is the ultimate in human endeavor. It requires three things: a heart large enough to deal with conflict positively, enduringly, and kindly; a keen sense of personal purpose, the notion that there is something on the horizon that is worth debating; and a soul sensitive enough to transcend the tensions of the immediate for the sake of the quality of the future.

I like that, the thought that the meaningful sharing of ideas “is the ultimate in human endeavor.”  I like less the thought that to engage in that endeavor requires something of me – heart, purpose, and a sensitive soul.”  But then, it occurs to me that the outcome is worth the effort, or, as one of my mentors used to say, “the juice is worth the squeeze.”

“Take heed, and beware of covetousness: for a man’s life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he possesseth.”  Luke 12:15 (KJV)

“Take care! Protect yourself against the least bit of greed. Life is not defined by what you have….”  Luke 12:15 (The Message)

This caught my eye and mind today because this is the time of year for tallying things up – on many fronts.   We are inundated with year in review “Best of” and “Top Ten Lists.”  It is also a time, in my profession, and I assume others, where ledgers are balanced and the year is analyzed in the fiscal sense.  In the vernacular, it is a time when the pie is split, and human nature being what it is, everyone wants as much pie as possible.

As such, it is a good time to remember that “a man’s life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he possesseth” or, “life is no defined by what you have,” no matter what or how much you have.

Of course, it is always a good time to remember that.

“Some people grumble that roses have thorns; I am grateful that thorns have roses.”  Alphonse Karr

This points out the duality of gratefulness and grumbling, both sides of the same coin.  The reality is that despite my insistence on doing so, it is difficult to judge, in the moment, the “good” or “bad” of the consequences of a given event until its impact plays out in time.  Don’t get me wrong.  Some acts, some events are genuinely “bad,” but they seem to somehow “turn out alright” in the end, at least when viewed from a distance, over time,    In the context of the quote, am I focusing on the thorns or the roses?  Each time I start thinking down this path I think of Radney Foster’s tune – Half My Mistakes:

Half of my mistakes I swear I should’ve known better
Half of my mistakes were just amongst friends
You get a little distance on it, the truth is clearer
Oh, and half of my mistakes I’d probably make ’em again

 

We can search to the point where only wonder will do or we can turn the spiritual life into some kind of corporate strategy aimed at storing up rituals in return for heaven.”  Joan Chittister

Chittister notes that all faith leads to some doubt, or at least to “the point where only wonder will do….”  Faith that leads to certainty, particularly faith that seems to suggest that I have figured it all out (and THEY haven’t) isn’t really faith at all.

In any event, I like that phrase – “the point where only wonder will do….”

“In all things give thanks….”  Thessalonians 5:18

It occurs to me that gratefulness, being thankful, requires faith.  Faith does not, at first blush, seem to be required to allow me to be grateful for the positives in life.  A win, found money, a beautiful sunrise or sunset, a heartfelt “thank you,” all seemingly require no faith.  In some sense one could say that those things “just happen” and leave it at that, but the mere fact that I am being grateful seemingly expresses some level of faith, otherwise, to whom or to what is the gratefulness directed?

But of course, life is not always so kind, the object of gratefulness not always so agreeable.  Being grateful for “negatives” requires faith in something else, faith in a Master Plan, in something or someone else beyond me or my limited capacity to understand.  So, gratitude for an illness, for a run of bad luck, for lost money – those are more difficult as they all require faith to get there.

This is both freeing and scary.  The good news is that I am not in charge.  The bad news is that I need to make peace with the good news.  But for now I can just be grateful for faith, and how it lets me, if I let it, be grateful in all things.

Lyrics from a song by Johnny Gimble.  Photo taken at Blue Genie Holiday Show in Austin.

I had some last-minute things to check off my list yesterday, and so spent half the day here and there around town.  Before leaving I put on a Santa Hat, the traditional red hat, furry white trim, ball on top, and kept it on during my errands.  What became apparent to me throughout the morning was that the hat influenced how I acted during the day.  I mean, who wants someone thinking about them —  “That guy in the Santa hat is a real asshole?”  As I wound my way through the crowded grocery store with my cart, I was less hurried, more inclined to let people by.  Looking for a parking space I was more willing to let folks turn in front of me, even if we were competing for that parking spot.  I was humming Christmas songs most of the morning.  (Okay, nothing really different there, I do that all year.)  Something akin to Frosty’s silk hat, there was a transformation.

It was, of course, not the hat.  Nor was it Christmas.  It iwas/s a state of mind, and I can, if I choose, have it all the rest of the year without people wondering “Why is that guy wearing a Santa hat in July?”  There is of course no original thought here.  This thought is in fact much older than the May of 1957 date on this passage from Dr. Seuss, but this passage is what came to mind.

“But this sound wasn’t sad!
Why, this sound sounded glad!
Every Who down in Whoville, the tall and the small,
Was singing without any presents at all!
He hadn’t stopped Christmas from coming! It came!
Somehow or other, it came just the same!
And the Grinch, with his Grinch feet ice-cold in the snow,
Stood puzzling and puzzling. “How could it be so?
It came without ribbons! It came without tags!
It came without packages, boxes, or bags!”
He puzzled and puzzled till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before.
Maybe Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store.
Maybe Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more!”

Here’s to the “little bit more.”  Merry Christmas – always.